Monday, February 9, 2015

My live tweeted BAFTA thoughts...

So, last night I was babysitting duty while the wife and girls went to a party, so I decided to educate the boy on things that men do in this Awards Shows.  Yup, no football here (although I did admit to watching the Super Bowl last week), it's straight up celebrities and red carpets and awkward speeches!

I think he enjoyed himself.  Luckily for him, he fell asleep before Eddie Redmayne gushed all over the podium.  

So, I also decided to completely live-tweet, since I had no real distractions, which was...not as fun as I thought it was going to be.  But, regardless, I figured I'd use all my tweets as my BAFTA post, since they pretty much sum up my thoughts. we go:

 I truly meant to take pictures of this, the two of us lounging out in bed eating pizza and watching the show, but my timing was off and we wound up getting home with pizza a whole thirty minutes before it we ate at the table like good boys who don't leave crumbs in the bed and piss off the woman of the house.

A boy can dream, right.  I mean, I wasn't predicting it, but I was hoping for it.

Then it started, or at least their shitty idea of red carpet started (like, here's ONE thing they could learn from E!...probably the only thing...and then again, I can't stand E!'s red carpet, so maybe they should just stick to doing what they're doing, which is pretty awful in its own right)...and I saw this:

That puff of purple was Edith Bowman.  Yeah, I don't know who she is, but she apparently doesn't want us to see (or re-see) her purple shoulder pads because every picture I found on the internet would not embed onto my blog, so whatever.  She decided to ask everyone she talked to what their first theater film experience was or what their first Hollywood crush was, and some of the answers were interesting, some bland.  My first 'remembered' film experience was Beauty and the Beast and my first 'remembered' crush was Claire Danes...

For on and on about how many people you forget to thank and can see it in his eyes...this guy is just the worst.

This was a sign...and very big sign...a warning sign, actually.

And that's really the extent of my caring about this red carpet.  Like, it was so rushed (not live, just highlights) and that Bowman woman was insufferable, so I kind of zoned out...but then I saw this:

MY GOD, Keira Knightley is just one of the most stunning creatures on the planet.  This is such a marvelous outfit too.  She's giving me such biker chic, and then...BAM, it's this beautifully detailed cocktail dress that looks so youthful and spunky and at the same time so elegant.  She's just the best.

I hadn't even seen The Imitation Game, but like, I'd sacrifice goats and sheep and stuff to the Oscar Gods if it meant that Keira Knightley could win an Oscar.  LOVE her! 

Apparently, I did care more about the red carpet than I remembered, because I just saw all these:

So, yeah...apparently there was all that.  So, yeah, BAFTA apparently likes to reward stars that we hear very little about, and when you consider the field, which usually includes really big names or breakout stars who turn around and take Hollywood by storm, the winning field is odd (like, Redmayne lost in his year and look at him now).  I also want to encourage more comedy for Fiennes, who delivers one of the greatest performances of the year, period, in The Grand Budapest Hotel.  I still think Keaton is winning the Oscar, yes, and I was semi-drunk already so I honestly didn't know what time it was.  

And while I have not seen Simmons, so I cannot judge his actual performance, Edward fucking Norton was beyond words incredible in Birdman, and even if now, like, his career alone deserves an Oscar.


Pretty much exactly this.  I've already watched it three times since Friday.  I'd watch it again right now if I wasn't busy piecing this post together.

I typed this tweet out like four times because I honestly wasn't sure if it WAS Cuba Gooding Jr. (like, who invites him anywhere?) or if it was the lighting and the shades that were confusing me and I was afraid of getting a slew of 'racist' comments on my tweet due to my confused ignorance, but I wound up going for it, and when he came out later to present an award (really, why?) I felt better about this.  But really...WTF?

And before we get into the actual ceremony:

For real, I'm asking because I don't know and while I could Google this, I am too busy (again) piecing this post together so...

He really did nail it, from start to finish, the whole night.  LOL at my wife coming home right around the Fellowship Award and actually saying to me "he's really corny" and I thought to myself, "this is why we don't watch this stuff together".

And then the awards spilled in:

I found that montage to be quite odd since they basically regurgitated clips from about five different movies, which made BBC's contribution to cinema to be rather...light, especially when the clips you keep showing us are from films like Jude and Iris, which are pretty old (Jude is 1996, and Iris is 2001), but BBC loves Kate Winslet and so we love BBC. 

And to break up the winners list:


And we resume:

This made me uncomfortable for many reasons and in many ways.  Like, first, who is Cuba Gooding Jr.?  I'm sorry, but this is just weird.  Like, BAFTA could and should have done better than this.  Is he a star over in Britain?  And this is coming from someone who actually has defended his Oscar win (undeserved in that field, but overall not an awful win and a very lively and fun performance), but he's pretty much become an awful actor since the 90's and, despite having a mini-comeback in bit roles in large-cast black cinema lately, like, ANYONE ELSE FROM SELMA WOULD HAVE MADE MORE SENSE...and then he has to go and mug for attention by asking for a kiss (and throw out the whole "what, a black man..." THANK GOD Fry just bit the bullet, kissed him, and shut him up.

And then boredom wins again, crushing my Knightley dreams, and gave us yet another awful, bloated, nap inducing speech.

Maybe I should have too...

UGH!  She's just my favorite thing of all time right now.  She's beautiful, charming, talented...oh, and she's standing next to Martin Freeman (who was so good in Fargo I want him to get a great film role so I can root for him to win an Oscar)...and she gave the Cinematography BAFTA to Birdman, so she's pretty much perfect.

I understand the devastating loss of someone as richly embedded in the fabric of cinema like Richard Attenborough, and I get that he touched many, but Downey Jr.'s speech was just, hard to watch.  I didn't buy it, but maybe in retrospect I should have, but at the moment it felt so forced and just...maybe it's the fact that he has that face I want to punch and I have grown to form this, probably irrational, hatred for him, but whatever.

The many, many tweets felt more genuine to me.


Best dressed of the night; for real.  Like, she actually DID HER HAIR, and her dress fit like a glove, and she looked classy yet sexy and just utterly perfect; like a real winner.

Moving onto the actual award, I have no idea what is going to happen come Oscar night.  The one thing I do know is that Boyhood isn't winning it, for this has come down to a serious two-way race between The Grand Budapest Hotel and Birdman.  Part of me thinks that Wes may actually win this one, especially if Birdman is going to take Picture and Director, as some sort of consolation win (since even if his film sweeps the techs, he won't be winning any of those awards), but I have doubts.  As much as I would rather see Birdman win here, since it's script was superior, Wes Anderson's written speech (delivered by Ralph Fiennes) was the greatest acceptance speech I've ever heard in the history of my personal awards watching.

She does have two Fistis, which is great for her (like she cares), but she's also threatened to quit acting recently, so her lack of Oscar (and increasingly dying chances of ever getting one) stings a little (a lot) since she's probably one of the best actresses to ever grace the screen, ever.

It was a pretty incredible lineup, but this was inevitable.  They love to award their own, especially if they've started on British television.

To be more specific:

Score ~ The Grand Budapest Hotel
Hair and Makeup ~ The Grand Budapest Hotel
Costume Design ~ The Grand Budapest Hotel
Production Design ~ The Grant Budapest Hotel

And then Whiplash takes Editing and Sound, while CITIZENFOUR gets Doc, LEGO takes Animated, Ida takes Foreign and the shorts are awarded.

Oh, and I forgot to mention this:

Is Harvey really going to lose this Oscar?

And, finally, here are my random thoughts on the last (big) awards of the night:

Yeah, Linklater is starting to feel like Fincher (this idea was flirted with during the beginning of the critics run, and then dismissed when he became this unanimous choice, but now...) and yet I'm actually happy about this, but I'll spare you my constant Boyhood berating for once.  Redmayne's story about food poisoning was...sickening...and every time they show a clip of Moore in Still Alice I'm confused, because, it looks so...dull, her performance included.

But I love her, so I'm sort of ok with this...

In conclusion:


  1. LOVE your live tweets, great idea btw, I should do that for the Oscars :) I just posted my quick thoughts on it. I'm still #TEAMBIRDMAN and I wish Gugu dearest had won the Rising Star award :(

    1. As much as the tweeting itself felt uneventful (like, where was everyone?) it really did help in compiling a post about it, so I'm ok with it. I may try it for Oscar too, if I can actually get time to myself (which, I doubt)...yesterday was a fluke.

      And so much Team Birdman...and Gugu :-(

  2. I wish they'd air the BAFTA's live in the states, then I would've watched along.

    Poor Redmayne, everyone is hating on him now. lol I still think he was wonderful in Theory.

    Zzzzzz Arquette. Zzzzz Linklater. Zzzzz Boyhood.

    Budapest winning all of this stuff is interesting, but I love that Whiplash won editing.

    1. I haven't seen Theory, so I can't judge on his performance, which I'm actually excited to see...and I loved him in Les Mis, so I don't always hate him as an actor...but his antics this awards season are ridiculous. He looks like a complete fool. Like, I understand campaigning, but have some dignity about it.

      LOL...snooze indeed.

      Buda winning was really bizarre and yet completely sensical in some ways. I'm really anxious to see how Oscar plays out.

  3. OK, that is fun. Why is Cuba Gooding Jr. there? What is so special about him? The fact that he went full-retard on Radio? That shit makes me sick. Keira looked great as did Hayley Atwell. Julianne Moore.... holy shit! She's gorgeous.

    1. The introduced him as part of the cast of Selma, a film they wholly...snubbed, so it was weird to me.

      And Julianne was like OTHER LEVEL last night.

  4. I don't think I will ever tweet but I liked reading this here:) My first film experience was Tidal Wave and then after was The Last Valley(drive-In). My first crush was Christopher Reeve. I am getting sick of Eddie as well-he seems so smarmy. I did not watch these awards or the Grammy's. Keira is pregnant so she does look better-not so rail thin

    1. Yes, pregnancy is a beautiful thing on Knightley.

      I also said I'd never tweet...and then about a year ago I started and have never looked back :-D

  5. I thought RDJ's tribute was lovely, sounded very sincere to me. He comes off smug a lot but the one thing he always shown was the appreciation for the - most of - people he worked with. I adore Keira but her outfits this season are just awful. The dresses all sucked, no exception imho.

    As for Fry and the show itself I think it is the classiest there is in Oscar season and that's why Fry's ignorant crack about Russian soldiers met the horror of myself and clearly Matthew Goode who raised eyebrows. Other than that it was fun, but this was just tasteless.

    1. Yeah, you mentioned that on you post too, and I must have missed it (or maybe it didn't air over here) because I don't remember that joke...

  6. Great post! Ha, I watched the Grammys, but I did watch the BAFTAs online later. Stephen Fry really should host everything, and Kristin Scott Thomas should definitely have an Oscar by now. Gugu and Keira forever!

    Speaking of Martin Freeman and Fargo, I just bought season 1, so I'll be watching it soon. :)

    1. I really meant to review Fargo after I watched it...but then it got away from me. Freeman is ridiculously good in it, and every time that Thornton wins an award or is nominated over him, I die a little inside.