Friday, May 30, 2014

Vaughn’s oats have been sewn…


As a man, I think it’s safe to assume that I’ve spent quite a few hours of my life lingering in the shower long after I was done getting cleaned up.  It’s just a part of being a guy.  One thing I’ve never done (well, I won’t say never) is tended to particular duties in a public place.  While you may say that a sperm bank isn’t public, it is a place where everyone knows what you are doing behind that closed door.  I have a hard time with that.

True story:

A few years back (quite a few) when my wife and I were attempting to start our family, we visited a fertility doctor and of course the first thing they did was hand me a plastic container and pointed to a small room in the corner of a bigger room that was full of women sitting at desks, all of the desks regrettably facing that small room.  I walked over there and had a very pretty young woman point to a box of ‘magazines’ and tell me to make sure I didn’t get any saliva in the cup.  Not sure what she thought I was going to do in there all by myself, but honest to god she told me that.  Leaving that room and facing all of those women while I was holding this plastic cup in my hands (because I didn’t see the paper bag next to the sink that I was supposed to put it in) was really…well, there are no words truthfully.

I’m not a shy man by any means, but that was awkward.

How Vince Vaughn managed to do that 600+ times is beyond me.



Yup, ‘Delivery Man’ tells the story of David, a single man with responsibility issues who is trying to commit to his girlfriend and his job when he finds out that the sperm bank he donated to hundreds of times (under the name ‘Starbuck’) made a really big ‘oops’.  That ‘oops’ has made David a father of over 500 kids, and 142 (random number) have decided that they want to know who he is.  Of course, he is under no obligation to divulge his identity, since it is confidential, but he finds himself being sued by these kids and after taking an interest in them, he starts to get all paternal.

I don’t know why, but I have a real soft spot for Vince Vaughn.  I always have.  I remember being a kid and being drawn to him, and this was back in the 90’s when he thought that he could make it as a dramatic actor.  Thankfully, his career got a second wind (or maybe it was a first wind) when he realized he was far better suited for comedy, and I still remember how the world was kind of taken aback by the way he so causally floated across the screen next to Pitt and Jolie in 2005’s ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’.  It was like a rebirth of sorts, and since then his career has been hotter than expected.  YES, Vaughn plays the same character in every single film, but he’s so natural and endearing in each of these movies that I find myself compelled to see them all.  Sure, they don’t always work as a whole, but he usually works, regardless of the film.



‘Delivery Man’ is a very dumb movie.  So much of this film makes no sense in retrospect, but it is handled so well that it almost doesn’t matter.  I could sit here and poke at every plot-hole or dumb twist (that whole section with the addict daughter was ridiculous) and yet why should I bother.  Vaughn is funny, charming and endearing and by the end of the movie you are completely satisfied with his happy ending.  Sometimes that is all that matters.

I give this a B-.  Like I said, this is DUMB, but it works really well in spite of all that dumbness thanks to some sharp pacing (which moves swift enough to cause us to excuse the last dumb for the next dumb) and the fact that it's just so damn charming.

6 comments:

  1. I have no interest in seeing anything that Vince Vaughn does anymore. He plays the same shit every time and it looks like he doesn't even care. I just wanna punch him in the face and burn whatever money (though I will take a few of what he has) he has in his wallet.

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    1. I love how our reactions to Vaughn's same 'ol same are polar opposites.

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  2. I do want to see this, as I'm also a fan of Vince Vaughn. Some people are just so good at playing the same character that it doesn't matter. He was actually close to a CinSpec nod for Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I love him in that movie. I even like his more sinister turns in Clay Pigeons and Domestic Disturbance. I hope he gets a really great role at some point.

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    1. LOL, I love that he comes close to a nod for Mr. and Mrs. Smith! That's the same year I shamelessly give Kevin James a nod for Hitch!

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    2. Yeah, I LOVE that you nominate James that year! I guess Vaughn's spot goes to Luke Wilson for The Family Stone. He's just so right for that role.

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    3. 2005 had a bounty of comedians who aren't taken seriously delivering in films that not many people take seriously...and yet they were awesome!

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