Alright, so I’m bored so I’ll ramble on about some current film (or celebrity) news.
First off, thank you National Guard for saving my beloved Russell Crowe. LOL, like, not really saving him but whatever. Apparently he was lost while kayaking and the Guard swooped in and helped him on his way. They get marks in my book for that, and doesn’t Crowe look adorable in his Noah beard? Speaking of Noah, does anyone else get the feeling that this may actually be released next year? I know that there is a lot that will go into the actual effects for this movie, and that does take time, but it’s only September and they’ve been filming for over a month already so this really could be more than ready for Oscar season 2013. I, for one, am really hoping for that. I don’t want to wait two years for this movie!
Next up, let’s talk about Jeremy Renner and his ridiculous career. I find it baffling that people are surprised he followed up The Hurt Locker with a slew of franchises and cheesy genre crap. I mean, what did he do BEFORE his Oscar nominated film? Um, S*W*A*T? Seriously, the guy has always made dumb movies. The only difference now is that he is actually starring in them and not merely playing a supporting character whose face doesn’t appear on the poster. Yes, he did that Dahmer movie and had a thankless role in North Country, but take a look at his IMDB page and tell me that he has built a decent resume…I dare you. Let him wallow in his newfound niche. He’s not really worth getting all antsy about. I mean, this is coming from something who really loved what he did in The Hurt Locker, but his face offends me. I can't think of a single actor who looks more like a douchebag. I just really hate looking at him. But anyways, the reason I even bring this up is because the trailer for his new ridiculous Van Helsing wannabe movie was just released. God, take a look at this awfulness.
In recent movie watching news, I was rounding out my 1957 viewings and saw Band of Angels the other night. Holy hell was that movie terrible. I seriously find it hilarious that people are trying to defend it on certain websites. Really? First of all, it is hilariously melodramatic to the point of camp comedy and the performances by everyone in the film are laughable. Yvonne De Carlo is pretty yet obviously thinks that she is in a soap opera, and Clark Gable could never get the monologue right and walks around like a stiff breeze the entire film. Sidney Poitier’s character is a mess, but his performance is just as choppy, which is a shame since he also starred in ‘Edge of the City’ this very year and delivered one of his finest screen performances.
The concept of a white woman shielded from the fact that she is half black and then being ripped from her life and sold into slavery when her father dies is kind of bizarre and yet acceptable in the world of moviedom, but it never really translates well and the relationship that is born from Amantha Starr and her ‘master’ Hamish Bond is unbelievable and kind of creepy to be honest. The film is pretty and the costumes are lavish, but they cannot hide the glaring (and I mean G-L-A-R-I-N-G) flaws that permeate this stupid movie.